Doctor Who, food, LJ - what else would I talk about?

[selenay]

So, LJ appears to be back now. And filled with spam! I've received more spam on my journal this week than I usually do in a year and most of it doesn't seem to have a 'mark as spam' option when I go to delete it - WTF LJ?

Argh.

Today I did lovely boring stuff like banking and filing taxes. Then I thought that I'd take myself out for lunch and have that burger I've been promising myself as a treat.

Tip to the wise: never look up the nutritional stuff on a treat.

I got myself so stressed about the calories+prednisone fear, the "what if it hurts me?" fear and my generalised food fear that I had nightmares about it last night and decided this morning that I was definitely not doing that. Instead I took myself out for lasagne, which wasn't amazing but was filling and I hadn't looked at anything to do with the nutritional stuff before I went. It also only contained meat, cheese and pasta which have never caused me problems before and the burger that I really wanted contains onions, which have on occasions caused problems. I feel absolutely fine right now, although I do feel like a bit of a crazy lady for getting myself so totally stressed over a treat.

This whole experience appears to have traumatised me. Urgh.

Only a week to go!

Comments

[fahrenheit-f430.livejournal.com]

It'll take some time, but you'll eventually start eating blind (no looking at the ingredients list/calorie computations) and feel better for it. I can't say anything that'll help, but I do know what it's like (I sat around waiting for a headache after eating my first piece of cheese in 5 years, and eventually made myself sick 'cause I couldn't stand waiting for the pain to hit me).

I got round my food fears by saying 'I'm going to try a little xyz today', and keeping my old pain medications on hand just in case. So, you're basically going to have to train yourself to be lazy. I advise that you keep the boxes for 24hrs after eating something, it'll act like my pain meds security blanket, and you won't feel like you're being too reckless/taking your eye off the ball. But that's about all I can come up with. I do know what you're going, through, and it WILL get easier.

[selenay]

It does help knowing that I'm not the first person to go through this. Thanks, hon {{{hugs}}}

It's something that I'm going to have to work through and I know that in time it will get easier. When I've prepared it, I know what's in it and that seems to make me relax completely. I've just got to get past that and not feel this insane need to over-think it all, check ingredients, check nutrition - time will hopefully do the trick for me.

[nic]

Tip to the wise: never look up the nutritional stuff on a treat.


Whenever I do that, I don't eat anything else but lettuce/spinach/carrots the rest of the day.

Also, I'm so glad to hear that the treatment seems to be working postively so far.

[selenay]

I killed myself on the Wii Fit yesterday instead. Despite not eating the evil bad thing. My brain needs re-wiring, I think!

Thanks :-) Tomorrow is Humira day - I'm oddly excited about it!

[wadjet-theperv.livejournal.com]

Oh love :o( I'm pleased that the lasagne sat well and the Humira seems to be working. I can understand you getting stressed though, when something so simple, that most people take for granted, ie the food you eat can make you feel so wretched, you look at it in a completely different way.

I really do hope that this starts a new chapter where that kind of paranoia disappears and food can just be food again. Something to enjoy with friends, for the sake of it, or just to fuel the body. xx

[selenay]

I think that I just need time and to work up to things gradually. I was feeling pretty good about food until the first treatment plan didn't work, that was when I started to get a bit crazy. Hopefully as I gain confidence in the Humira, I'll get happier with food again.

[clairecnc.livejournal.com]

Sorry I'm a bit behind, but I'm going to combine everything into this one post.

I can sympathise with the control over food, I sit there carefully calculating how much I can have before my stomach rejects it etc... but one day you'll relax into it all. It's still new and scary at the moment, but with time it'll get easier I'm sure it will.

I'm glad to read that things are improving a bit for you :) Also people can and do manage to control their weight whilst on Pred, my Mum only put on a little bit, which was mostly fluid, so it came off again easily. People only ever seem to want to share horror stories, so hopefully this will reassure you a bit.xx